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Be your own weird self!!!

Updated: Apr 21, 2023


“Every last one of us is weird and different and that’s a beautiful thing. Diversity is not something to be threatened by. Or to avoid. It’s to be celebrated”.

Pam Grout

Have you ever arrived at an event, party, adult education class, residential course, competition or turned up on the first day of a new job without knowing anyone and had a hundred unwelcome thoughts making themselves heard along the lines of…


· I don’t fit in

· No-one will talk to me

· Why did I bother turning up?

· This isn’t where I belong

· There is no-one here like me

· I look weird

· I’m always on my own

· I won’t have anything interesting to say

· I want to hide

· Oh please let just one person greet me…

· I have a spotlight on me, everyone can see I am awkward, weird and don’t want to be here…

· People will judge me…


Perhaps school days weren’t that great – maybe it was difficult to find kindred spirits. For some people, those negative beliefs can continue on into adulthood, and if left to their own devices could lead to social-anxiety. So it is well worth reining them in.


Worrying about standing out from the crowd is actually very common, but it can feel very isolating and fear-inducing. But imagine if we were to welcome our individual weirdness (unique selves) and choose to believe that all of us have something to offer: what difference would it make if we chose to reframe a negative narrative we have carried with us our whole lives?



If we accept that we are weird/unique/diverse then, to me, that means we have a unique purpose in life. In other words, there are things that only we can do not in spite of our differences but because of them. A unique pathway or niche that is just for us.


It can sometimes be helpful to ask yourself what evidence there is to support any negative beliefs.



The next step could be to consider an alternative way of thinking…for example:


· “Even though I did not enjoy the last party very much, this one is different and it is possible I will meet some interesting people.”


· “Although I accept that sometimes I feel as if I have nothing interesting to say, I notice that I am interested in what other people say so perhaps it is reciprocal.”


· “Do I have any proof that I won’t fit in? No…”


· “Although I worry that I look different to other people, maybe they are worrying about the same thing. And even if other people do think I look weird, does it even matter?”


A wise sage once said:

“ What other people think of you is none of your business!”


What do you think about that?!


Maybe now, you think, yes, OK, you will embrace your imperfections or differences and accept that you are imperfectly perfect, just as you are....but what next? I appreciate that this kind of change does not happen overnight - it can take a long time and a lot of practice - I am sorry if I have made it sound like an easy magic trick! It isn't, and many of us need to continually work on reframing negative inner messages. If any of this resonates or you would like to chat further about any of the points raised, please do contact me.


Further thoughts:

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